asurroca

I’ve been job hunting lately, and writing a good cover letter is the
most important thing you can do, but after writing them over and over
again, the process becomes quite tiring. It’s no wonder so many people
write lame letters from templates and get nothing. I thought it was
time to make fun of cover letters. The result, after the jump.

Dear n00b Hiring Manager

I found your job posting via Simply Hired and was immediately excited because they use web2.0 AJAX tricks, unlike the other n00b sites like Monster. This tells me that you’re the right company for me because I’m totally 1337.

After doing a tracert on your e-mail a whois on your IP, I was able
to track down exactly where your server is located and find your
business’ address from that information. Then, I saw that you had
already provided your address and phone number in the e-mail. So, I
totally hax0red your work computer and d/l some unflattering photos of
you involving two Asian men and a donkey, hax0red your home security
system to call the cops in your name, and filled your home computer
with trojanz and rootkits! OMG you’re such a n00b!

I hope that this proves that I am not a n00b and will totally pwn
your whole I.T. department. I also pwn n00bs pretty much all day on WoW
and will require a nice Voodo or Alienware rig with three 20″ (at
least) widescreen displays in my office.

I look forward to our interview this Monday at 10AM, so I already
added it to your Google Calendar when I hax0red your account. Also, I
added myself to the employee database, and made my salary $1 milion a
year. LOLs! pwned!

Alfonso Surroca

P.S. I don’t gamble online. Your tubes are safe.

technorati tags:job, career, humor, letter, pwn, n00b, IT

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